Shut Up and Stop Complaining: Keep Calm and Live In The Moment

Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present. – Marcus Aurelius

#march2019 #features #philosophy #stopcomplaining

A trip out of town with my significant other revealed each other's some sour, some sweet traits. For the most part it was bliss. We had disagreements and arguments along the way, but I guess it's only common in real relationships.

Some scenarios called me to lecture about some facts of general existence.

My SO, I must painfully admit, was not the sharpest in the Philosophy Department.

Life is not fair

I must start with a cliche that we fail to fully digest.

If you're expecting to always get your money's worth, and that vendors will always give you a bang for your buck, you're going to end up disappointed, sweetheart. We can't buy street-side strawberry shakes and expect them to have the same richness of a homemade treat. Learn to fucking settle for less when it comes to things like this.

Sometimes, you acquire more than your money's worth, too. We got awesome clothes from a thrift store at unbelievable prices, thanks to luck and haggling skills. Unfortunately, we can't haggle our way through life.

Basically, what you give is not always what you get. You need to be at peace with it and stop keeping a mental weighing scale in your head. Just enjoy what you have for the day and hope for the best!

Little expectations, less disappointment

If you want to truly open your eyes to the wonder of the moment, learn to close your eyes first.

“I was expecting that there was gonna be more trees around here.”

I did remember telling him explicitly that we were visiting a city located in a mountainous region, and that over the past decade, much tree cutting had been done.

Coming from a more rural setting, he was disappointed at how different the place was from his actual expectations. He thought there was gonna be hiking and going into the woods like some scenes in Twilight.

Um, sorry, we're staying in the heart of a city. Also, we don't have a car service to drive us to some secluded wooden area that's basically dangerous for tourists.

I want to believe that, as the trip planner and host, I have given him a good time by taking him out in the first place. Sadly, some people just can't be happy due to the fact that they're even existing and breathing air in a safe place.

Just because you found a “catch” doesn't mean you have to get it

You don't always need something more.

We live in the tropics. The temperature doesn't go below 15 degC. If you want to feel warm during the coldest weather, all you need is a shirt and a pair of long sleeves, or even a soft jacket.

You don't need an insulated, wool-lined jacket even if it's 90% off the brand new price. You just don't. Especially when we have spent beyond our expected budget.

And just because it's a popular brand, doesn't mean you have to buy it.

But if it's your money, go spend it however you like. If you want to follow a certain trend or way of spending money, follow your heart's desires.

Brand popularity doesn't necessarily equate to high quality and good style.

And one more thing about personal style — just because I surf doesn't mean I have to wear (awful) surf brands.

For heaven's sake, I surf because I love being in the water and getting pounded by waves.

No, dressing like a surfer doesn't qualify me as one. Catching head-high waves does. And I don't even complain about my wipe-outs to rides ratio (okay, I might be frustrated sometimes!) because I now understand that surfing is just all about being in the moment.

Lastly, all you have to do is to be thankful sometimes.

Stop complaining that the pasta is missing one auxiliary ingredient. That the milkshake has too few strawberries. That it's not as woody and cool as you expected. Just be thankful that we're making good memories together, and that I'm paying for everything.

Now all you gotta do is take my hand, smile, stroll, and allow yourself to be mesmerized and surprised.

The more you focus on the fine, inessential details, the less you see the big picture.

Just keep calm and live in the moment. Chill.

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What I ought to write next: