bleak and pretty

Our skin is our body, and yes, we are our skin – but we are not the imagery that you interpret from our tattoos.

It was so hot yesterday I came out of the house wearing a tank top. All my arm tattoos were exposed. People looked, of course, and somehow it made me feel naked — all those eyes scanning every inch of my skin.

But I carried myself proud and didn't mind the stares.

One person approached me, though. A fellow customer. He asked how much I spent on my arm tattoo.

It wasn't the first time I got asked that question. Once I was approached while I was walking down the street. I thought the guy was gonna ask for directions. I rolled my eyes at him when he blurted out his question.

How much is your tattoo?

For the record, tattoo prices vary, depending on the artist. Sometimes you get them for free. If you're planning to get a tattoo, asking me for the price of mine wouldn't help you at all assess the pricing of your own tattoo, or help you prepare for it financially.

If you wanna know how much a tattoo costs, go to an artist.

For fuck's sake.

And oh, the question I get asked most frequently is not about the price of my tattoo. It's if they were “real”, like, permanent.

What the fuck do you care, seriously. What does it matter to you if I've decided to mark my body permanently. Or temporarily. It is my fucking skin. Is it any of your business?

I've been told that arm tattoos do not look nice on a girl. Not on a Filipina. Not on a young woman with round eyes and an innocent face. Having these tattoos do not make me look respectable anymore.

It's not even like I have a hannya tattoo or some demon creature scribbled on my arms. (I did want to get a hannya before, it just never happened.) And even if people did decide to get gruesome tattoos that didn't make sense — why should it be anybody's business? Why should it affect them as a person? How should it make them any less of a respectable person?

Tattoos are a collection. They just happened to be displayed and stored on our skin.

People collect crazy stuff all the time. You can't judge their personalities based on what they collect. You can't say that the person who collects thousands of bars of soap is a hygiene freak. Or that the man who's collected thousands of Coca-Cola cans a champion of capitalism.

Our skin is our body, and yes, we are our skin – but we are not the imagery that you interpret from our tattoos.

So please, stop judging. Stop assuming that because I have plenty of tattoos means I must be a slut, a murderer, a sex worker, or simply not respectful. No, I didn't come from prison. No, I never worked at a bar.

I just like to see a collection of ink on my body, that's all. I have some meaningful tattoos, I have some that aren't. I got cheap, ugly ones. I got impressive ones. They're a part of me. A collection that's gonna stay with me no matter what.

It's personal.